Such a great investment in studying without proportional results, as you described, are similar to the signs of learning disabilities, ADHD, or both. Emotional factors like fear of failure additionally can certainly worsen the condition.
We recommend not continuing to roll along in this cycle. You're already bright enough and big enough to decide on your own to break the cycle.
In the first stage, you should do a preliminary check for learning disabilities or ADHD. It's not worth doing a psycho-didactic evaluation when there's a possibility that there is only ADHD.
Here are a few preliminary sample questions for identifying learning disabilities in adults:
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Do you get confused with time, miss meetings, and arrive late to appointments?
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Does it take you too much time to read a page in a book?
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Can you list all of the months of the year in reverse order?
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Was it difficult for you to learn the multiplication tables when you were in school?
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Do you mix up between right and left?
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Is it difficult for you to remember things you read?
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Do you hate reading out load or in public?
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Do you hate reading long books?
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Do you make mistakes writing checks?
For assistance in a preliminary evaluation for learning disabilities, contact one of the Nitzan branches closest to your place of residence.
In any case, for an adult it's very important to know what's stopping him, it's important that he seeks to know the answer, only then can there be hope for a new direction. A person doesn't need to live with a question mark like this hovering over his head.
Studies from the last decade prove that in order to treat learning disabilities and ADHD in adults, the most important thing is the awareness of the disability; who am I, what do I have, who am I in contrast to my disability? These are two things that can be differentiated between. This is what influenced people and changed their lives.